Oh Fun Factory

Dear Fun Factory

I’m a long distance admirer. I own one toy of yours (Bimini Ocean, review pending) and I use your body lube on a semi regular basis, and I think it’s my favorite. Amongst the public, there is a consensus that your toys carry strong motors, body safe silicone, whimsical colors, and efficient batteries. You run an ethical business all under one roof and have resisted the urge to outsource your labor to China or Pakistan unlike so many of your competitors. You invented the pulsating vibrator, an achievement in futuristic off-jerking. I have recommended toys of yours to other people on the basis that they’re high quality, sturdy, fun (looking and using) and a conscientious choice in the market. So I mean no disrespect by the below statements.

But I gotta know, Fun Factory, two things:

Who told you that’s where my clit was? That’s not where it is. I don’t think anyone’s clit is there. Is your clit there? Like a centimeter from your vag?
Why do you make toys that can see me? Flexi Felix knows where he’s going, and I don’t think he’s too happy about it. Nor your dolphin…people…things. Why you doin’ that?

Shine on, you crazy Germans!


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